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Pre-order the NEW Arcane Bullshit

Arcane Bullshit is getting a ridiculous upgrade, and we’re accepting pre-orders NOW. The new deck features a ground-up redesign, 20-something brand new cards, a printed guidebook, and vastly improved packaging.

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PRE-ORDER YOUR DECK NOW

Bullshit tarot cards for weirdos!

Arcane Bullshit is a profoundly mystical alternative to tarot. Same premise of using words and pictures to expand your intuition across an infinite plane of shadows, but with none of the self-serious baggage. Time to relax your third eye and let the bullshit flow.

If you love weird art, confusing mixed metaphors, making enemies, and the occult – Arcane Bullshit is for you!

Consult Arcane Bullshit for questions about: Love, finance, health stuff, future stuff, and the infinite grinding abyss inside your soul!

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About

Harness The Power of Bullshit.

Arcane Bullshit is a completely serious and functional fortune-telling oracle deck. It was forged in the crucible of eternal mysterious awesomeness and is a direct conduit to forgotten realms of reality-bending Bullshit. Just draw a card, stare into the profound imagery it reveals, then make up some shit about the future!

The Arcane Bullshit Oracle Deck features:

  • 100 original black and white illustrations
  • Dark, angsty subject matter
  • Surprisingly profound dick jokes
  • Ultimate mystical power!
  • Irony!

Mobilize your Bullshit.

Want to commune with the ancient spirits of Bullshit while you wait for a bus, or during your annoying son Kent’s flute recital? There’s an app for that! Check out the Arcane Bullshit App for Android.

WARNING: Use of Arcane Bullshit is not recommended for clerics, bishops, sapient dolls, anyone born before 1960, nieces, or butlers. Consult a physician immediately if you experience mind-rending hallucinations lasting longer than 666 hours, or your fingernails turn into soap.
For best results, set up a wicker tent in your den, home office, or wherever dark and unspeakable rites are performed. Consecrate the tent with koala tears and vermouth. Kneel on a balsa rod for no more than 66 seconds. Do not attempt to use Arcane Bullshit without a level 36 ectoplasmic shield, and a 4″ brass toad. Ages 9 and up.

Contact

We are Listening.

Got a question? Suggestion? Query? Complaint? Some input? Feedback? Request? A message? Use the form below to contact an ARCANE BULLSHIT representative.